Here in our “Dating Advice” section, we’ll try to answer every question we can think of that deals with Dating. We’ll touch on every subject from First Kisses to “Where do I go for a First Date” and “When to say I Love you” down to “Should We Break Up”.
If you have any questions or suggestions relating to Dating, that you don’t see here or within our Dating section of MakingHerDay.com, please let us know by sending us an email to: feedback@makingherday.com
We’ll do our best to add your questions or suggestions to this section if enough feedback comes back to us on it and we’ll do our best to reply quickly to all your emails.
Where should I take her? | What should I talk about on our dates? |
What do I do if the first date goes bad? | When should I try for the “First Kiss”? |
How do I go about internet dating? | What if we don’t have a connection? |
How should I go about dating someone with a child or if I have a child? | Is it ok to stay in every once in a while? |
How do I keep things from getting dull & boring? | Is there such a thing as too much time together? |
How do you know you’re in love? | Should I tell her I love her? |
What do I do if I feel she doesn’t trust me? | What do I do if I feel like I don’t trust her? |
Should I break up with her? | How do I break up with her? |
Where should I take her?
Depending on how long you’ve known her and her personality there’s many places to go and things you can do. If you barely know her or never seen her in person, the best place to take her is a coffee shop, dessert place, or meet her up for drinks at a nice lounge somewhere local to her. You’ll want to set up a short meeting with her in case either of you don’t connect with each other or just aren’t interested. This date is best for someone you met through online dating, through a friend’s hook up, or a blind date.
If you’re getting to know the girl (like a first or second date) and you know you’re somewhat interested, do something different. See if she’s into anything specific or enjoys a certain type of thing or place and go for a date involving that. Try to make the date fun and interesting. Maybe include dinner along with an activity if your schedules can fit it or if not, do one or the other.
If you’ve been with her for a while, you should know her favorite places or the type of woman you have. Take her to her favorite place from time to time or if she’s into trying different things, go on the internet or look through a phonebook and search for local restaurants in your area. Every now and then do something different and plan trips together.
(For more ideas on things to do or places to go, see our Ideas section)
(For more help on dating, see our entire Dating section)
What should I talk about on our dates?
Honestly, you can talk about anything on your dates. Just make sure she’s into the conversation you’re trying to have also. You can talk about sports briefly but if you see she’s not interested, you gotta change the topic. We’re not saying lets try and talk about purses now, but try to find something that you both can relate to and have a conversation about.
If you don’t know her well yet, that’s perfect thing to talk about. Find out things about her without seeming like you’re interrogating her. Just ask the simple questions like what does she do for a living, where she grew up, or ask her what she’s into to try and find something you can have a conversation about. Hopefully one of those topics can lead to other topics or leads to other questions and go off that.
Make sure you’re not just asking questions and you’re throwing in things about yourself also. Keep your conversations on positive topics and go with the flow. If she brings up a negative topic, try switching the topic without being too obvious or talk about it briefly and move forward.
What do I do if the 1st Date goes bad?
If the first date goes bad or any date for that matter, the best thing to do is to think about what went wrong or why you think it went bad. If you find that you said or did something that may have caused the date to go bad, call her and apologize for what happened and see if she’s interested in giving you a “Re-do” if you’re still interested in seeing her.
If there was something that she did to make the date go bad, think about what happened and be true to yourself and ask if you’re truly interested in seeing her again. If you are, don’t wait for her to call you or apologize. Call her and let her know that you’d like to see her again regardless of what happened. If you’re not interested in seeing her again, be honest and let her know the next time you speak that you don’t feel it can work or that you’re not compatible.
In a situation where you’ve known the person for a while, be upfront and honest and talk to each other about what happened. Hopefully, it can be resolved easily or it was nothing more than a misunderstanding and you can both move forward.
When should I try for the first kiss?
To be honest, there is no right or wrong time to try and kiss someone for the first time. You just want to make sure you feel it’s the right time for you and her and that you get a sense that she’s into you enough to kiss you back.
Kissing on the 1st date is a real judgment call based on how well the date is going and if you’re both that into each other that much. For the most part, waiting until the 2nd or 3rd date is a better choice. It gives you the time to think about what you really liked about that person, your thoughts about seeing her again, and it gives you time to reflect on how good your date(s) went with them. After that it’s a matter of waiting for the right moment, time, or opportunity.
(See more information regarding the First Kiss in our “Early On” section of Dating.)
How do I go about internet dating?
First thing you’ll want to do is to choose a site that you feel comfortable with. There’s Match.com, True.com, eHarmony, Lavalife, Singlesnet, and many many more to choose from.
Go to each site, see their rates, make a free membership, and look at some of the profiles in your area that they have. If you find that you’re interested in a few profiles that they have, sign up and choose the best package for you to join their site.
After that, see our “Getting Her Attention: Online” section of MakingHerday.com for help on internet dating.
What if we don’t have a connection?
If after a few dates or over time you get the feeling that you’re not as interested in the person you’re seeing, take time out to think about what you’re feeling and try to come to a decision. If you come to the conclusion that something’s missing or maybe you just don’t feel a connection to her, meet up with her to discuss your feelings in person and try to end things with her as nicely as possible if they can’t be worked out.
How should I go about dating someone that has a child or if I have a child?
If you or the person you’re dating has a child, you have to be patient, understanding, and respectful to your or their children, responsibilities, and circumstances. Not every situation will be the same but remember to always keep in mind that she has a child or that you have a child and that they come first in that persons life.
If you’re dating someone and you have a child or more, be upfront about it and make sure she knows. Don’t wait for a couple of dates or months to go and then mention it to her one day. If she knows ahead of time and she’s still interested in seeing you, you can be comfortable knowing she’s ok with you having children, willing to work with you on scheduling time, and you can continue getting to know each other without worrying what she’ll think later or if she’ll want someone with a child.
If the person you’re dating has a child or children, make sure you’re able and willing to accept that and understand her situation. Be courteous to her responsibilities and her time. In most cases, it’s the mother that has custody of the child so do your best to understand that if she can only see you on certain days or at specific times, it’s mostly due to her responsibilities. If she does make the time to see you though, try your best to see her when she’s available or make plans ahead of time to make sure she can find away to be there. After that, plan something nice to take her away from home and enjoy your time together.
Is it ok to stay in every once in a while?
Of course it is. If you have your own place or she has her own, make a movie night, cook dinner for each other, or relax and watch some TV together. If you’re still living at home with your parents, make sure you have your own space there for a night together. As long as you’re both ok with staying in, it’s perfectly fine and easy on the wallet.
Just make sure if you do stay in a lot, that from time to time you make plans to go out. If you just stay in and never leave each others places, things can start to dull out. Keep that fire going in your relationship and go out every once in a while. If you decide to stay in, always remember you can spice things up with a candle or two here and there and a little planning.
(For more ideas to do when staying home, see “Dating Ideas” in our Ideas section)
How do I keep things from getting dull & boring?
To avoid letting things get dull between you and your love, try to experience new things together. Find new hobbies or things you can both do together or try something different that you’ve always wanted to try.
You can go with something small like starting a new dinner routine were every other Wednesday or once a month you try a different restaurant. Maybe do something a little more interesting like taking a dance or art class together and practice at home.
There are a lot of different & special things that you can do together. Just look around your neighborhood flyers or look them up on the internet. Have fun together and enjoy doing these things. It’ll give you both something to look forward too and help keep your relationship from going strong.
(For more ideas on what to do, see “Dating Ideas” in our Ideas section)
Is there such a thing as too much time together?
This is a hard one. It can go either way depending on your relationship and how both of you feel about time together and apart. For the most part you have to make sure you’re both happy with the amount of time you’re seeing each other. If you feel that you’re not having enough time to see your friends or just have some “me” time, you should take a day, two, or how many you need for yourself and the same should go for her. If she has school work, work to do at home, or just wants some time for her self, make sure you give her that.
If you feel you’re not getting enough time together, just mention you’d like to see her a little more and see what she says. If she’s busy, you have to be understanding to her schedule. If you feel she’s not giving you the time you need, talk about it and see if it can be worked out.
If she feels you’re not giving her enough time, try to work it out that you see her a little more. If you can’t, explain to her why and see if some kind of arrangement can be made to see each other a little more.
As time goes by together, you’ll both find that perfect balance of time together and apart with each other.
How do you know you’re in love?
There’s no exact way to know. Love is one of those things were you know when you know. There are little signs that you can use to judge if you’re falling in love or you might already be.
Here are a few things to look for to see if you might be falling in love, or are already in love:
- Thinking about her all the time
- Smiling by just thinking about her
- You feel like you can’t wait until you see her again
- You just get that feeling like “wow she’s great!”
- You want to bring her everywhere you go
- Songs on the radio start sounding like they were written for you and her
- You realize you haven’t seen your friends in a while…..and you don’t mind
- You just feel a different “vibe” with her and you love it
Should I tell her I love her?
If you’re sure you’re in love and you want to tell her, of course you should! Why hide what you’re feeling? The next time you’re out together, talk about how great things have been going with the both of you and look into her eyes and tell her you’re in love with her.
Now, don’t expect an “I love you too” to come right back at you. Sometimes, you might catch her off guard with your feelings and she’ll have to think about where she is emotionally in your relationship. Don’t take it as a bad sign and let her know that you didn’t say it so that she can say it back. Just let her know you wanted to express how you feel about her.
And to be honest fellas, sometimes girls wait on us to be the first one’s to throw out the “Love” word. So don’t sit and wait for it. If it she says it, she says it. But keep in mind that she might be waiting for you so that she knows how you feel first and can then say it back.
What do I do if I feel she doesn’t trust me?
If you feel she doesn’t trust you, the first thing you should do is try to understand why you’re thinking that and think to see if you’re giving her reasons to maybe think she can’t trust you.
Have you been caught in a lie or do you do things to give her reasons not to trust you? Once you think about this, try having a conversation about trust and honesty with her and express your thoughts positively. Talk to her regarding your thoughts and why you think she may not trust and see what she has to say. It all just may be a misunderstanding.
After the conversation, take note to what maybe be causing her not to trust you or you’ll clear up your mind regarding her trust on you and work on fixing it. Hopefully that’ll clear everything up and have you both working towards a trusting and beautiful relationship.
What do I do if I feel like I can’t trust her?
If you feel like you don’t trust her, ask yourself why and make sure that they’re logical reasons to your mistrust in her. The next time you see her, try and bring it up casually and in a non-aggressive or argumentive way. Tell her you’ve had some things on your mind and you just wanted to clear them up so that you both can move forward together as a couple.
If you find that after the conversation, those feelings of not trusting her still exists, you may have to end you relationship unless things can get worked out. However, if you still doubt the person you’re with, you’re better off separating than over analyzing everything that may cause you not to trust her each day.
Trust is something that is hard to regain and needed for a healthy relationship. It’s simply just not worth it to constantly be worried if you’re partner is being honest. You should be able to have trust and faith in your partner and she should have the same with you.
Should I break up with her?
Only you can truly decide if you should break up with her. Go over your relationship in your mind and ask yourself if you are happy. Do you still feel a bond and a connection? If the answer to any of those questions is no, there’s no reason for you to be involved with that person any longer.
If you’re not sure that you want to be with the person you’re with, don’t stay in the relationship for sake of staying. Think to yourself, can you see yourself with this person for the rest of your life? If the answer is no, regardless of how hard it is, you should end things amicably.
Also, more importantly, if you’re being physically or verbally abused in your relationship, understand that you don’t have to take it. End things as soon as possible with that person and move on in your own time to someone that will appreciate you and what you have to offer.
How do I break up with her?
Breaking up can be one of the hardest things to do. Especially when the other person may not want to end the relationship you have together. But the proper way to do it should be in person. Not via text message or an email and try not to end things over the phone.
Ask her to meet up with you and discuss you’re feelings and thoughts on your relationship and let her know easily and delicately. Do not verbally bash her by telling her everything that she’s done wrong to cause the relationship to end if she is the reason you want to end things. Be polite and just say you don’t think its working out or that you don’t feel that you have that connection with her.
If she takes it bad just try your best to console her but regardless of how nicely you put it, breakups are gonna suck and be hard on both of you. Wish her the best and let her move on.
